If any of my fine returning readers (hi mom) remember from earlier this year, you might remember my recent piece on Justin Bieber’s single, “Yummy.” You might also remember that I tore it to shreds. After writing it I went on with my day, feeling good about the criticism I gave.
Fast forward to this morning, and the first thing I saw on my music news was a “Country Remix” of the song with Florida Georgia Line. For those unaware, I grew up listening to my fair share of country music; that being said, I have no love for the band Florida Georgia Line. While my personal thoughts can not all be typed up in a neat and pretty format for this article, in short, I believe that they as a band are the reason mainstream country music became the boring, soulless, hip-hop-beat-stealing music of the early 2010s.
So, how does FGL’s presence in this remix affect the song? Well, it’s tough to say. Is the song good? Not at all. The song still has the same issues that I had with the original version: a boring beat, a droning dragging bassline, and lyrics that made cringe:
Shoutout, girl, I’m on my way
I been up in Waffle House, but you my Chik-fil-A
And I been into waffle fries since our first date (Haha)
Ain’t got time for playin’, I’ma clean your whole plate
So, does an added banjo and new verse make for a palatable track? No, not really. That being said, the only thing that kept me from hating this version of the song as much as the original was that it did not seem to be taking itself seriously. I felt like the entirety of the song was tongue in cheek, and an attempt to make a bad song worse, but ironically. Is it going on any playlists of mine? Absolutely not. But, it might be worth an irony listen or two.